Friends Gail and Nick on s/v Destiny stored halibut in our freezer, but after that our paths diverged. Since we didn't know when or if we would meet up again, we transferred their fish to the m/v Passage. These tongue-in-cheek emails resulted... ;-)
Dear Sir, Madam and Mascots:
It has come to our attention that our fillet account which was entrusted to your institution has been transferred to another account without our authorization. Further more we believe the status of said fillets may be endangered due to illegal pilfering by untrustworthy freezer operators. It is commonly held that the M/V Passage has a past history of unsecure fillet handling. Specifically, we are worried about the possibility that our fillets could be exposed to fire. M/V Passage has been known to remove banked fillets and place then near or on a BBQ. In addition, we have received no statement of our account while banked at your institution. We were hoping that the account would have earned some interest while in your care (even bottom fish deserve interest). We are also concerned that our entire account may be frozen - thus limiting our ability to liquidate same.
Dear Valued Customer:
We would like to assure you that we would not have transferred said fillets unless we were certain that they would be safe with the current freezer operator. About the interest incurred: we must remind you that this was not a savings account that earns interest, rather we have fees associated with your account that have been left unpaid. We accept legal tender, meals, salmon fillets, dominoe games and various and sundry other items as payment for said fees. Again, we want to assure you that you are a valued customer and we would welcome your deposits after our fees have been met. We are only slightly concerned that we will not meet up with you again to settle this matter as you seem to be traveling in areas where our "chicken of the sea" crew does not intend to go. We are also concerned about your mental health as the fish stories you tell are quite the works of fiction.
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